Well, this is it. Getting on a plane home in a matter of hours rather than months, weeks, days. I'm looking forward to it, but also sad to leave Asia, I feel very settled and would be quite up for another jaunt round Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia. But money/ time is holding me back, and I'm also suffering from a mysterious tropical disease, which I'm praying won't generate into dengue, so I guess it's time to head home. I realised today that this will be the first time I've spent more than one night in my own bed in six months and I must say, I'm quite excited, because it's rather comfy, especially compared to the sheets of hard hard rubber they call "mattresses" in Asia.
So in the time-honoured tradition (started about 6 weeks ago by Big Nessy J) here is a list, well actually, two: Things I will miss about Asia and Things I will not miss about Asia
Things I will not miss about Asia
1. Pavements that are like obstacle courses, complete with gross puddles erupting from dodgy paving stones
2. Feeling like you've run a marathon after walking down the street
3. Mosquito bites
4. The ridiculously long distances places are from each other
5. "Hey, you, where you go?"
Things I will miss about Asia
1. Delicious iced drinks for ridiculously low prices, especially mocha yen from Coffeezilla and cha yen from Mr. Willeam
2. Feeling the wind in your hair riding a motorbike without a helmet
3. Sangsom (cheap but delicious Thai rum)
4. The food. Oh my god, the food. Especially street pad thai, garden kaeng phet (red curry), northern sausage, chayote with garlic and oyster sauce, Thai omelettes, northern roast pork, temple khao soy, suki, ka-nom, iberry ice cream, jasmine rice, pad kra pao... ok, everything.
5. The people: Win and Nicky, reppin' Thailand, but also all the Americans, Canadians, Australians, English, Vietnamese, Lao, Chinese, Burmese/ Lisu, Thai Yai, Malaysian.... the list goes on. But everyone I've worked with who have all been absolutely lovely, even if they did make fun of my accent (Americans), force me to drink (Win, prime culprit, but also Clara), make me eat parts of a pig that no-one should eat (again, WIN but also Nicky), rufie me (Win yet again) or just generally bullied me.
Anyway, it's been an amazing summer but it's time to go home now. First on the list for when I get back are proper bread, well toast and marmite, cheese, sleeping, moving in to the House of Leck and also catching up with all you lovely people patient enough to read right to the end of my blog in real life!
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Bangkok and the Bus from Hell
I'm back in Bangkok (for the fourth time in my life) and for a change, I'm actually starting to like the place. It seems to get better every time I come here. I think the difference is that this time I'm staying in Silom, rather than Khao San Road, the backpacker capital of the world and possibly the Worst. Place. Ever.
Well it's not too bad... if you want to book a cheap bus ticket to pretty much anywhere, buy harem pants and fake sunglasses and drink cheap sang som. But I'm not in the mood for all that at the moment so I decided to stay somewhere a bit more anonymous, and so I'm now tucked away in a hostel on a back street in Silom, the business district.
This is actually quite a promising location - the skytrain is just down the road and I can get to anywhere in the city (except for the dreaded Khao San Road, which has no transport links whatsoever except backpacker buses) for 20 baht on the skytrain, which is shiny and super air-conditioned. Today I ventured to Siam Square, where I checked out Siam Paragon, Bangkok's fanciest mall and looked at things I couldn't afford, like Mulberry handbags and italian-thai fusion cuisine. The air conditioning was nice though... then I headed out to the street market, got an iced coffee and generally had a wander. It felt a bit like New York or maybe Singapore, giant malls, big brands and sunshine. And for the first time, I began to quite like Bangkok. I had a hint of this wandering road Jatujak market last time around and now I really get it... Bangkok is trendy and shiny, full of beautiful people and with malls, restaurants, cafes and bars everywhere, if you can afford them. Sadly I now have no money and I'm on my own, so I'm not really in much of a position to enjoy it but still, if I ever hit Bangkok for a 5th and final time, it's gonna be amazing. Tomorrow I'm going to hunt down some contemporary art.... there's a promising exhibition about being a minority by a feminist and a gay native of Isaan (one of Thailand's most rural and poor provinces, in fact where I was last night, but on to that in a minute) that sounds very me. Today it was a bit difficult to do much because it's the 4th anniversary of the coup that outed Thaksin Shinawatra (the leader the red shirts all support) so there's a massive red shirt rally downtown. I saw it from the skytrain. I'm really hoping it doesn't get violent or cause trouble because a) I don't want to get blown up and b) I want to be able to catch my plane home tomorrow!
Anyway, before Bangkok there was Nong Khai, a sleepy riverside town just across the Mekong from Laos. I went to the pretty awesome and crazy hindu mystic sculpture park which involved giant snakes, climbing into the mouth of a stone dragon and skeletons holding hands, as well as sunburn from cycling down the highway. Most of my time though, was spent sitting in the hostel garden on the riverbank and gazing at Laos on the other side. It was kind of nice to be somewhere fairly off the beaten track though, just a random Thai town without much to recommend it. Unfortunately, the journey from there to here was fairly hellish. I would have been quite willing to pay the extra 100 baht (£2) for the 1st class bus, but couldn't find it, so instead I got the 2nd class bus. This was a mistake.
The bus left at 5.30pm, which in itself was absurd because it was an 11.5 hour journey, meaning we would arrive in Bangkok at 5am. At 6.30pm, after being on the road an hour (and having already stopped once), we arrived in Udon Thani. We then waited there for an HOUR AND FORTY MINUTES, with a full bus of passengers, for no discernible reason. I was the only foreigner on the bus and my Thai isn't good enough to ask why we were waiting, but it is good enough to know that at no point did the driver suggest we could go eat, go to the bathroom, or do anything other than sit in the bus. I was beginning to panic that the bus had broken down and I'd be out on my own in Udon Thani, but eventually we left again, only to stop again approximately every thirty minutes FOR THE ENTIRE SEVEN HOUR JOURNEY. (apologies for all the caps lock but I'm really quite irate). We also had the standard thai bus absurdly timed food stop, at 1am this time, and the old asian classic, turning on very loud local pop music at some ungodly hour of the morning, in this case 3am. I'm used to this and now have the ideal weapon: my bloody valentine's "loveless" at full volume, an epic wall of sound but also quite soothing. Lifesaver. Still, any thought of actual sleep was firmly crushed by the hard seats and the fact that at every one of the approximately one million stops along the way, they turned on all the lights at shouted in Thai. Finally the nightmare was over and we arrived in Bangkok AT THE WRONG FUCKING BUS STATION. At this point I just wanted to get to a bed as fast as possible, so I grabbed a 7-11 pizza bread to soothe my soul and jumped in a taxi meter to my hostel in Silom. Thankfully there was no traffic (one of the few benefits of arriving at 5am) and I arrived at my hostel by 5.30, paying only 100 baht... thus making the journey from hell equal in cost to the 1st class bus that would have arrived at a time for sane people who could get the skytrain. However, the journey had one last sting in its tail... the hostel was locked. I stood there banging on the door and was just about to sit on the kerb and sob, when finally things changed for the better and the door was answered... by an incredibly sexy english-Vietnamese guy, who I then did my best to chat up, despite the fact that I looked and smelled awful from the long journey (and the sunburnt cycling) and I had had no sleep so I was getting slightly delirious. And then I got a bed and all was well. The End.
Well it's not too bad... if you want to book a cheap bus ticket to pretty much anywhere, buy harem pants and fake sunglasses and drink cheap sang som. But I'm not in the mood for all that at the moment so I decided to stay somewhere a bit more anonymous, and so I'm now tucked away in a hostel on a back street in Silom, the business district.
This is actually quite a promising location - the skytrain is just down the road and I can get to anywhere in the city (except for the dreaded Khao San Road, which has no transport links whatsoever except backpacker buses) for 20 baht on the skytrain, which is shiny and super air-conditioned. Today I ventured to Siam Square, where I checked out Siam Paragon, Bangkok's fanciest mall and looked at things I couldn't afford, like Mulberry handbags and italian-thai fusion cuisine. The air conditioning was nice though... then I headed out to the street market, got an iced coffee and generally had a wander. It felt a bit like New York or maybe Singapore, giant malls, big brands and sunshine. And for the first time, I began to quite like Bangkok. I had a hint of this wandering road Jatujak market last time around and now I really get it... Bangkok is trendy and shiny, full of beautiful people and with malls, restaurants, cafes and bars everywhere, if you can afford them. Sadly I now have no money and I'm on my own, so I'm not really in much of a position to enjoy it but still, if I ever hit Bangkok for a 5th and final time, it's gonna be amazing. Tomorrow I'm going to hunt down some contemporary art.... there's a promising exhibition about being a minority by a feminist and a gay native of Isaan (one of Thailand's most rural and poor provinces, in fact where I was last night, but on to that in a minute) that sounds very me. Today it was a bit difficult to do much because it's the 4th anniversary of the coup that outed Thaksin Shinawatra (the leader the red shirts all support) so there's a massive red shirt rally downtown. I saw it from the skytrain. I'm really hoping it doesn't get violent or cause trouble because a) I don't want to get blown up and b) I want to be able to catch my plane home tomorrow!
Anyway, before Bangkok there was Nong Khai, a sleepy riverside town just across the Mekong from Laos. I went to the pretty awesome and crazy hindu mystic sculpture park which involved giant snakes, climbing into the mouth of a stone dragon and skeletons holding hands, as well as sunburn from cycling down the highway. Most of my time though, was spent sitting in the hostel garden on the riverbank and gazing at Laos on the other side. It was kind of nice to be somewhere fairly off the beaten track though, just a random Thai town without much to recommend it. Unfortunately, the journey from there to here was fairly hellish. I would have been quite willing to pay the extra 100 baht (£2) for the 1st class bus, but couldn't find it, so instead I got the 2nd class bus. This was a mistake.
 |
| The Bus: I know it doesn't look that bad but trust me, it really was |
The bus left at 5.30pm, which in itself was absurd because it was an 11.5 hour journey, meaning we would arrive in Bangkok at 5am. At 6.30pm, after being on the road an hour (and having already stopped once), we arrived in Udon Thani. We then waited there for an HOUR AND FORTY MINUTES, with a full bus of passengers, for no discernible reason. I was the only foreigner on the bus and my Thai isn't good enough to ask why we were waiting, but it is good enough to know that at no point did the driver suggest we could go eat, go to the bathroom, or do anything other than sit in the bus. I was beginning to panic that the bus had broken down and I'd be out on my own in Udon Thani, but eventually we left again, only to stop again approximately every thirty minutes FOR THE ENTIRE SEVEN HOUR JOURNEY. (apologies for all the caps lock but I'm really quite irate). We also had the standard thai bus absurdly timed food stop, at 1am this time, and the old asian classic, turning on very loud local pop music at some ungodly hour of the morning, in this case 3am. I'm used to this and now have the ideal weapon: my bloody valentine's "loveless" at full volume, an epic wall of sound but also quite soothing. Lifesaver. Still, any thought of actual sleep was firmly crushed by the hard seats and the fact that at every one of the approximately one million stops along the way, they turned on all the lights at shouted in Thai. Finally the nightmare was over and we arrived in Bangkok AT THE WRONG FUCKING BUS STATION. At this point I just wanted to get to a bed as fast as possible, so I grabbed a 7-11 pizza bread to soothe my soul and jumped in a taxi meter to my hostel in Silom. Thankfully there was no traffic (one of the few benefits of arriving at 5am) and I arrived at my hostel by 5.30, paying only 100 baht... thus making the journey from hell equal in cost to the 1st class bus that would have arrived at a time for sane people who could get the skytrain. However, the journey had one last sting in its tail... the hostel was locked. I stood there banging on the door and was just about to sit on the kerb and sob, when finally things changed for the better and the door was answered... by an incredibly sexy english-Vietnamese guy, who I then did my best to chat up, despite the fact that I looked and smelled awful from the long journey (and the sunburnt cycling) and I had had no sleep so I was getting slightly delirious. And then I got a bed and all was well. The End.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Vientiane
I forgot just how much I liked Vientiane. I was beginning to see the whole trip as a bit of a chore, because I was so sad to be leaving Chiang Mai and didn’t relish the thought of a 14 hour journey, even if it was on a VIP bus. But actually, after the 17 hour red truck, VIP bus, local bus, tuk tuk, shuttle bus, tuk tuk and yet another tuk tuk extravaganza, I was across the border and firmly settled in Vientiane.
The city is an odd mix of French colonial architecture and very Lao temples, with tropical plants popping up in between the cafes serving fresh baguettes and croissants. The pace of life here is slower than Thailand, and I was perfectly happy in the afternoon just to stroll around, through the city and then along the banks of the Mekong.
Sadly, the cheap food stalls where you could sit on a mat on the floor and eat a local meal are gone because of a development project on the river. I’ve written about it before so I won’t dwell on it now – something I didn’t realise was that the project should actually stop the city being flooded, and there is now a lovely park where you can sit on a rusty swing seat and look at Thailand across the river.
For lunch I went to JoMa, Lao’s answer to starbucks and had a hoummus and roasted vegetable wrap (with olives – I nearly came) and an iced coffee. JoMa is pricey but it’s also epicly good, and I have been deprived of middle class food for months, so I indulged. I don’t think I’ll get a chance to eat the street baguettes, which are outrageously good – I even saw the Vietnamese ones which are one of my favourite asian snacks. If I have any kip left I’ll get one for lunch – I’m desperate to avoid taking any across the border because its’ impossible to exchange.
In the evening I ticked off the other things on my lao to-do list – laap, beerlao and sticky rice in a bamboo basket. Just for the record, beerlao is the most delicious, smoothest beer in the world and your life isn’t complete till you’ve tried it.
And laap was more yummy than I remembered it – cold minced pork with chillis, spring onions, mint leaves and unidentifiable local herbs. Laos is one of the world’s poorest countries and often overshadowed by Thailand, it’s richer neighbour, but one thing Lao people are really proud of is that they make the best sticky rice in the world.
So after a delicious meal I crashed out pretty early, and then took advantage of the free breakfast this morning. I’m now headed to the bus station to catch a local bus across the border, and planning to chill out for a night in Nong Khai before heading to Bangkok and then HOME. Hopefully this journey should be a relaxed hour and a half, although I’m expecting the worst bus in the world, but you never know – Lao time is considerably slower than Thai time so I have no idea when I’ll eventually make it… currently though, I’m soaking up the relaxed pace of life and not bothered about that at all.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Goodbye Chiang Mai!
Today is my last day in Chiang Mai before I make a seriously convoluted journey home, passing through Laos, Bangkok and Mumbai (airport). I'm sad to be leaving the people and the city but I think it's time to go. I'm the last intern left in the BABSEA house now and it's quite sad - although it's all changed since The Americans were here, and I did get a whole double bed to myself last night.
Apparently I am sharing the house with a ghost - my boss is firmly convinced the house is haunted and actually called a priest in to do a Thai exorcism or calming of the spirits. Apparently this involved offering the ghost a roast chicken, I kid you not. Thai people are quite strong believers in spirits and ghosts - a relic of a pre-buddhist animist tradition. Every house has a little "spirit house" outside and people normally offer the spirits food and incense.
Apparently wooden houses have the most ghosts in them because trees have spirits too. And if you do see a ghost (which is most likely if you're about to die, you're pregnant or you're a dog) you're not meant to mention it to anyone so the ghost doesn't know you know it's there. Anyway, over the past week we have managed to thoroughly freak ourselves out by telling ghost stories and living in a massive empty house is pretty creepy anyway, so it's probably best to leave before I give myself a heart attack.
That was completely unrelated to the whole "i'm leaving" theme but never mind. Chiang Mai is an awesome city and I've got very settled here - it's got a population of a million but it never feels too big because it's quite low rise and you can cycle everywhere. It's got plenty of wats and old things, but it's a massive student city so there's delicious cheap food on every corner and packed bars and clubs everywhere you turn. The cafes are trendy and the coffee is delicious, so you always bump into people just hanging out, studying whatever. No-one seems to stay at home because there's just too much fun to be had out and about. So yes, I love chiang mai and if you ever get a chance, come visit!
The saddest thing about leaving though isn't the city but the people, especially Win and Tze.
Both of them have taken me places you'd never go as a tourist, either in the front seat of Win's BMW or on the back of Tze's bright green motorbike. Win is a self-declared playboy who has mastered the English sexual innuendo, but also incredibly sweet and generous (like all the best playboys, you always think they're good boys). Tze's personality can be summed up by the fact that the three things he says he needs to be happy are japanese wood sandals, a micro pig and a packet of marlboro smooths. You'd better add chewing gum to that list, because despite being 24, he's still hiding the fact that he smokes from his mum. He also gets up at 5am every day to make the best noodles in Chiang Mai, before working at BABSEA and squeezing in studying for an MBA in between. Win studies law, takes us to restaurants, drinks black label whisky, goes to the gym and chats up girls. Over the past few weeks he's become a combination of tour guide, younger brother, chauffeur, study buddy and best friend and I'm not quite sure how I'll cope without him picking me up for lunch every day when I get home.
I'm excited to be moving on though, beer lao and laap are callling me... after a 14 hour bus journey that is.
Apparently I am sharing the house with a ghost - my boss is firmly convinced the house is haunted and actually called a priest in to do a Thai exorcism or calming of the spirits. Apparently this involved offering the ghost a roast chicken, I kid you not. Thai people are quite strong believers in spirits and ghosts - a relic of a pre-buddhist animist tradition. Every house has a little "spirit house" outside and people normally offer the spirits food and incense.
Apparently wooden houses have the most ghosts in them because trees have spirits too. And if you do see a ghost (which is most likely if you're about to die, you're pregnant or you're a dog) you're not meant to mention it to anyone so the ghost doesn't know you know it's there. Anyway, over the past week we have managed to thoroughly freak ourselves out by telling ghost stories and living in a massive empty house is pretty creepy anyway, so it's probably best to leave before I give myself a heart attack.
That was completely unrelated to the whole "i'm leaving" theme but never mind. Chiang Mai is an awesome city and I've got very settled here - it's got a population of a million but it never feels too big because it's quite low rise and you can cycle everywhere. It's got plenty of wats and old things, but it's a massive student city so there's delicious cheap food on every corner and packed bars and clubs everywhere you turn. The cafes are trendy and the coffee is delicious, so you always bump into people just hanging out, studying whatever. No-one seems to stay at home because there's just too much fun to be had out and about. So yes, I love chiang mai and if you ever get a chance, come visit!
The saddest thing about leaving though isn't the city but the people, especially Win and Tze.
 |
| Xiaomei, Me, Win and Clara - dream team! |
I'm excited to be moving on though, beer lao and laap are callling me... after a 14 hour bus journey that is.
Friday, September 10, 2010
Lecker?
Today is one of my last days in Chiang Mai, so my colleagues took me out for a proper Northern Thai lunch. The restaurant was on the top floor of an old wooden house, you had to take your shoes off to go in, and once there, you sat on the floor. The best table had a hole in the floor underneath it so you could dangle your legs into nothingness.
I usually let Win and Nicky order for the table, but they generally have some pretty bizarre ideas about food (Nicky genuinely likes durian ice cream), and are determined for us to try "proper thai food". So lunch today involved, from the normal to the truly bizarre:
fish tom yam (fairly standard, but spicier than the english version and without coconut milk)
two whole fried fish, complete with heads
pork laap (shredded meat with chilli and herbs), but fried and crispy
tiny fried fish (eaten whole, including head and bones)
fried pig intestines
fermented egg salad
The fermented eggs deserve some explanation - they involve burying an egg for three months with some ash, after which it goes black and develops a kind of jelly-like consistency, but stays egg-shaped. This is the best picture I can find:
They look kind of fun, right? Stylish colour combination, maybe? And they taste better than they sound - just like a slightly more eggy egg. Especially when served with fish sauce with chilli and garlic, and a bit of shredded mango and maybe a few cashews.
But anyway, the moral of the story is that Thai food in England is NOTHING LIKE Thai food in Thailand. Well, the standard red curry green curry pad thai are all pretty similar, except they change the flavours a bit for westerners - less chilli and less fish sauce. And in Thailand, pad thai is a quick solo lunch, bought off the street wrapped in a banana leaf, rather than something to be eaten in a nice restaurant. But Northern food is totally different - think lots of pork, normally roasted or fried, rather than in a curry, sticky rice and an omelette here or there. For your vegetables you get possibly my favourite dish of all, fried chayote (a local dark green vegetable) with garlic and oyster sauce. And of course, the Chiang Mai staple, Khao soy, noodles in a spicy coconut milk soup, with crispy ones on top, served with bits of lime, chives and red onion.
If you venture out onto the street you get the truly weird and wonderful local dishes, involving every edible bit of an animal - pork skin, chicken feet, congealed blood, intestines. And eggs cooked every imaginable way - like egg shell omelette, for example. Or for dessert, a creamy coconut milk soup with a whole soft-boiled egg lurking beneath the surface. Thai people generally order "family style" too, with a big selection of dishes for everyone to share, meaning you can sample the weird stuff without being stuck with a whole bowl of blood soup, which is just grim.
And obviously, it all costs next to nothing. So then I get put off from eating Thai food in England, because it's only the boring options at generally 10 times the price, but nowhere near as good. Sigh.
I usually let Win and Nicky order for the table, but they generally have some pretty bizarre ideas about food (Nicky genuinely likes durian ice cream), and are determined for us to try "proper thai food". So lunch today involved, from the normal to the truly bizarre:
fish tom yam (fairly standard, but spicier than the english version and without coconut milk)
two whole fried fish, complete with heads
pork laap (shredded meat with chilli and herbs), but fried and crispy
tiny fried fish (eaten whole, including head and bones)
fried pig intestines
fermented egg salad
The fermented eggs deserve some explanation - they involve burying an egg for three months with some ash, after which it goes black and develops a kind of jelly-like consistency, but stays egg-shaped. This is the best picture I can find:
They look kind of fun, right? Stylish colour combination, maybe? And they taste better than they sound - just like a slightly more eggy egg. Especially when served with fish sauce with chilli and garlic, and a bit of shredded mango and maybe a few cashews.
But anyway, the moral of the story is that Thai food in England is NOTHING LIKE Thai food in Thailand. Well, the standard red curry green curry pad thai are all pretty similar, except they change the flavours a bit for westerners - less chilli and less fish sauce. And in Thailand, pad thai is a quick solo lunch, bought off the street wrapped in a banana leaf, rather than something to be eaten in a nice restaurant. But Northern food is totally different - think lots of pork, normally roasted or fried, rather than in a curry, sticky rice and an omelette here or there. For your vegetables you get possibly my favourite dish of all, fried chayote (a local dark green vegetable) with garlic and oyster sauce. And of course, the Chiang Mai staple, Khao soy, noodles in a spicy coconut milk soup, with crispy ones on top, served with bits of lime, chives and red onion.
If you venture out onto the street you get the truly weird and wonderful local dishes, involving every edible bit of an animal - pork skin, chicken feet, congealed blood, intestines. And eggs cooked every imaginable way - like egg shell omelette, for example. Or for dessert, a creamy coconut milk soup with a whole soft-boiled egg lurking beneath the surface. Thai people generally order "family style" too, with a big selection of dishes for everyone to share, meaning you can sample the weird stuff without being stuck with a whole bowl of blood soup, which is just grim.
And obviously, it all costs next to nothing. So then I get put off from eating Thai food in England, because it's only the boring options at generally 10 times the price, but nowhere near as good. Sigh.
Monday, September 6, 2010
headed for the open road
In my last few weeks here, my position has evolved (or possibly devolved) from "legal intern" to "glorified chauffeur". My job is to negotiate Chiang Mai's insane traffic in the infamous "rot BABSEA", a 20 year old mitsubishi champ with a few hundred thousand kilometers on the clock. I've already crashed it twice (lamp post, ditch), but no-one seems to notice, one of the perks of driving in Thailand. Downsides include a total lack of power steering, unmarked and pointy speed bumps on the road and other drivers. Thai drivers are, in a word, crazy. You think Italians are bad, but trust me, you ain't seen nothin' yet. On the motorway today people stopped to turn left without any kind of signalling, pulled u-turns in front of me, causing me to slam on my (pretty useless) brakes, and, most memorably, forced me to reverse round a corner for the first time since my driving test by powering up a very narrow soi towards me in an 18-wheeler.
But it can be fun too. The roads don't really have any speed limit, and I'm not paying for petrol, so it's fun to put your foot to the floor and head for the mountains. Today the shadows of trees on the straight road in front of me looked so much like oil from the distance I actually slowed down and tried to remember if you were supposed to turn into or out of a skid. Thankfully it was a mirage, because the split-second conclusion I came to was that I had absolutely no idea.
We were headed out to visit a couple of schools in Samkamplaeng to try and raise money for a marathon we're putting on in November. It's a beautiful place to drive, and today was a sunny respite from the grimness that is monsoon season. You see rice paddies on one side, little wooden houses on the other and mountains straight ahead, and you only have to slow round to swing round passing bicycles. When we got to the actual schools, me and Clara just smiled politely and let the Thai conversation wash over us. I picked up the bit when they looked at us and said "pratet angrit" (England) and "Oxford. The only reason we're there really is that in Thailand, your business looks better and more prestigious if you have a farang (foreigner) working for you. And the Oxford name has a lot of clout here, so they like to throw that one in, despite the fact that nothing in your university education has really prepared you for driving on Thai roads, which is the only useful thing you've done.
Ah well, I'm not complaining. It's fun to go as fast as you can, put some reggae on and head for the hills. It beats trying to u-turn on the ring-road anyway...
But it can be fun too. The roads don't really have any speed limit, and I'm not paying for petrol, so it's fun to put your foot to the floor and head for the mountains. Today the shadows of trees on the straight road in front of me looked so much like oil from the distance I actually slowed down and tried to remember if you were supposed to turn into or out of a skid. Thankfully it was a mirage, because the split-second conclusion I came to was that I had absolutely no idea.
We were headed out to visit a couple of schools in Samkamplaeng to try and raise money for a marathon we're putting on in November. It's a beautiful place to drive, and today was a sunny respite from the grimness that is monsoon season. You see rice paddies on one side, little wooden houses on the other and mountains straight ahead, and you only have to slow round to swing round passing bicycles. When we got to the actual schools, me and Clara just smiled politely and let the Thai conversation wash over us. I picked up the bit when they looked at us and said "pratet angrit" (England) and "Oxford. The only reason we're there really is that in Thailand, your business looks better and more prestigious if you have a farang (foreigner) working for you. And the Oxford name has a lot of clout here, so they like to throw that one in, despite the fact that nothing in your university education has really prepared you for driving on Thai roads, which is the only useful thing you've done.
Ah well, I'm not complaining. It's fun to go as fast as you can, put some reggae on and head for the hills. It beats trying to u-turn on the ring-road anyway...
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Gold label
Two Thai philosophies on drinking, from two experts on the subject:
"If you drink and you get drunk, it's fun. And if you drink more and get more drunk, then it's even more fun!" (Tze)
Win: "Are you drunk?"
Me: "No"
Win: "then drink!"
Pretty much sums it up.
"If you drink and you get drunk, it's fun. And if you drink more and get more drunk, then it's even more fun!" (Tze)
Win: "Are you drunk?"
Me: "No"
Win: "then drink!"
Pretty much sums it up.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
10 reasons I love chiang mai
When I travel I often find that I do what I do at home, but in a different location. Some of my favourite activities are hanging around in coffee shops, bars and restaurants. And chiang mai has about a million. In case you're ever around here, these are my 10 favourite places to sit and do nothing in chiang mai.
1. iberry
I'm there right now and have been for the past four hours.
2. the garden
Well, its real name is raan baan suan I think. You can get yummy Thai food for 50p. You may have to wade through a flood to get there but that only adds to the joy when you eventually eat. My favourites are the suki (fried glass noodles with meat, vegetables and chilli sauce on the side) and kaeng phet (spicy curry).
3. jerusalem felafel
You may think its crazy to come to thailand and go for felafel. But once you've been to jerusalem felafel, you'll understand why...
4. coffeezilla
It looks like the inside of an ipod and it makes an epic iced mocha. 'nuff said.
5. qbar
THAT bar on nimanhaemin. Don't get it confused with the other bar on nimanhaemin... Last night I had a cocktail that looked and tasted like mint choc chip ice cream. And you can sit on high stools and people watch in the centre of chiang mai's nightlife. Sights to look out for include hipsters in spray-on jeans despite 30 degree plus heat, high school kids trying to sneak into warm-up and drunk drivers.
6. warm upIt's hard to describe exactly why warm up is so awesome. Maybe it's the big bottles of sangsom for the same price as the 7-11. Maybe it's the fact that it also serves food, so you don't have to move when you get the drunk munchies. Or maybe it's just that you know it's where everyone in chiang mai will be on a friday night...
7. pun pun
It may take approximately a million years to get there, in which time you'll have been eaten alive by mosquitos, but it does make delicious vegetarian food and fruit shakes. My favourite is the indian curry with roti, but the veggie khao soy (northern style noodles with spicy soup) deserves an honourable mention.
8. monkey bar
I feel so much classier when I'm here: it's all low level white leather sofas and mood lighting. The elegant atmosphere doesn't stop me ordering a tower of Chang (thai beer that reportedly contains formaldehyde) though....
9. smoothie blues
even by western standards, the sandwiches here are epic. And right now it's avocado season - add avocado to your meal for 15 baht (30p).
10. the street
delicious food is everywhere in chiang mai. You can't avoid iced tea, roast pork, fresh pineapple, fried chicken, pad thai wrapped in a banana leaf and every conceivable kind of delicious thai meal being sold for virtually nothing on a street somewhere. Some of the best evenings I've had have involved strolling down to chiang mai university and grazing on street food until full. You can try the truly weird and wonderful - egg shell omelette, fried silkworms, chicken feet, and all the staples, and I've never spent more than a pound on a single dish. I think it's probably what I'm going to miss the most when I go home...
Saturday, August 28, 2010
poverty in the midst of plenty
I spent this morning in a slum. Not everyone's ideal weekend, but yknow, I get bored easily.
I was filming a documentary with TYAP: Thai Youth Action Program, an HIV and AIDS and human rights charity based in Chiang Mai. Well, I say I was filming a documentary, my main task was taking photos of other people filming a democracy, and playing with the cute but dirty kids.
The location was a village that looked like it should be in rural Cambodia rather than central Chiang Mai, one of Thailand's richest cities. I was in that same area last night at Airport Plaza, Chiang Mai's shiniest, most western style mall, where you can get "emporer class" at the movies and buy an iphone case in every conceivable colour, shape and texture. This was about as far away from that as you can get, in style if not geographically.
The community live in a set of buildings made out of bamboo and corrugated iron on swampy land somewhere behind a backstreet, invisible to the rest of the world. Most of them are hill tribes who have given their traditional way of life, either through the impact of 'development' i.e. building on traditional lands, logging or sheer poverty. In Chiang Mai they're the kids you see selling flowers to tourists in the Old city, betting a sale on games of 'rock, paper, scissors' with backpackers. They wash windows on the highway, or hang around at the end of nimenhaemin (the trendiest street in Chiang Mai) selling strings of flowers used to make merit.
It's weird, but despite being here and being familiar with the major denial of rights to these people, I never really noticed them before. This week, I've been doing research on the issue of statelessness among hill tribes. Most of them never had their births registered, and so don't have Thai citizenship. This means they have no access to employment, state healthcare, education or pretty much any of life's essentials. Some hill tribe people, especially Karen, Lisu and Hmong, cross borders with neighbouring Laos and Burma regularly, despite the danger, because their ethnic groups live on both sides.
The ones from Burma are in the most trouble - constant fighting in Karen state means that many of them are now refugees in Thailand, where they are confined in camps along the border pretty much indefinitely. Some of them have been there over 20 years, and fatalism, depression and suicide are on the rise. The ones who break out of the camps end up in places like the slum I visited today - living in absolute poverty and still without any hope of getting the magic Thai ID card that would give them access to basic services.
Getting Thai citizenship is a nightmare in itself - you need birth registration to get citizenship, but to get registered you have to be born in a hospital, and to be entitled to state hospital care you need... you guessed it... Thai citizenship! There are ways round it but they're just as difficult to access - anyone got two witnesses to their birth and lack of registration thereof who both have Thai citizenship? Nope, thought not. And just try navigating the maze of bureaucracy and forms to be filled in when you're illiterate and can't speak Thai (most of the hill tribes speak their own languages).
To be fair, the Thai government and the King are working on getting more hill tribe peoples citizenship, and so are NGOs such as BABSEA (where I work) and IMPECT (Inter mountain peoples' education and culture in Thailand). I'm spending this week trying to get my own head round the citizenship rules and figure out a simple way to teach it to a group of hill tribe women at the refuge where we do our human rights seminars.
But despite the work of Chiang Mai's millions of NGOs, it's going to be a long time before anyone pays attention to the people in the slums behind Airport Plaza. It's just like when they try to sell you the flowers on nimanhaemin - you roll up your tinted windows and drive smoothly by.
I was filming a documentary with TYAP: Thai Youth Action Program, an HIV and AIDS and human rights charity based in Chiang Mai. Well, I say I was filming a documentary, my main task was taking photos of other people filming a democracy, and playing with the cute but dirty kids.
The location was a village that looked like it should be in rural Cambodia rather than central Chiang Mai, one of Thailand's richest cities. I was in that same area last night at Airport Plaza, Chiang Mai's shiniest, most western style mall, where you can get "emporer class" at the movies and buy an iphone case in every conceivable colour, shape and texture. This was about as far away from that as you can get, in style if not geographically.
The community live in a set of buildings made out of bamboo and corrugated iron on swampy land somewhere behind a backstreet, invisible to the rest of the world. Most of them are hill tribes who have given their traditional way of life, either through the impact of 'development' i.e. building on traditional lands, logging or sheer poverty. In Chiang Mai they're the kids you see selling flowers to tourists in the Old city, betting a sale on games of 'rock, paper, scissors' with backpackers. They wash windows on the highway, or hang around at the end of nimenhaemin (the trendiest street in Chiang Mai) selling strings of flowers used to make merit.
It's weird, but despite being here and being familiar with the major denial of rights to these people, I never really noticed them before. This week, I've been doing research on the issue of statelessness among hill tribes. Most of them never had their births registered, and so don't have Thai citizenship. This means they have no access to employment, state healthcare, education or pretty much any of life's essentials. Some hill tribe people, especially Karen, Lisu and Hmong, cross borders with neighbouring Laos and Burma regularly, despite the danger, because their ethnic groups live on both sides.
The ones from Burma are in the most trouble - constant fighting in Karen state means that many of them are now refugees in Thailand, where they are confined in camps along the border pretty much indefinitely. Some of them have been there over 20 years, and fatalism, depression and suicide are on the rise. The ones who break out of the camps end up in places like the slum I visited today - living in absolute poverty and still without any hope of getting the magic Thai ID card that would give them access to basic services.
Getting Thai citizenship is a nightmare in itself - you need birth registration to get citizenship, but to get registered you have to be born in a hospital, and to be entitled to state hospital care you need... you guessed it... Thai citizenship! There are ways round it but they're just as difficult to access - anyone got two witnesses to their birth and lack of registration thereof who both have Thai citizenship? Nope, thought not. And just try navigating the maze of bureaucracy and forms to be filled in when you're illiterate and can't speak Thai (most of the hill tribes speak their own languages).
To be fair, the Thai government and the King are working on getting more hill tribe peoples citizenship, and so are NGOs such as BABSEA (where I work) and IMPECT (Inter mountain peoples' education and culture in Thailand). I'm spending this week trying to get my own head round the citizenship rules and figure out a simple way to teach it to a group of hill tribe women at the refuge where we do our human rights seminars.
But despite the work of Chiang Mai's millions of NGOs, it's going to be a long time before anyone pays attention to the people in the slums behind Airport Plaza. It's just like when they try to sell you the flowers on nimanhaemin - you roll up your tinted windows and drive smoothly by.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
i haz taken over
my name is Chester and i haz taken over this blog because Carla is shit and doesn't write anymore. Carla haz invaded my house so i haz invaded her blog. i read the Bangkok post every day and I like to eat frogs. I am watching you so you best be behaving...
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Things I did in Pai on Trip no. 3 (in order)
'rufied' myself with 2 baht (4p) travel sickness pills
discovered blueberry and hazelnut flavour pringles
ate goat jerky
rode the "Pai eye" (think the London eye, but smaller, made of wood and liable to make you feel like you're about to die)
walked on the "Pai canyon" (think the Grand canyon, but smaller, made of er... sandy rock and liable to make you feel like you're about to die)
visited a place from a Thai movie, without knowing anything about said movie
swung through the trees on a zipwire (also liable to make you feel like you're about to die)
ate blood risotto rice cakes and congealed blood soup (i am the best vegetarian EVER)
drank free shots of Chinese rice wine and Burmese home-brew rice whisky
watched Xiaomei drink all of the above, plus many B52s, mojitos and "rabbits" and remain completely stone-cold sober
watched Olive suck his own sweat from his armpit in lieu of the salt for his tequila slammer
learned how to say "she is very drunk" and "i am tipsy" in Thai (thank you Ajaan Win)
heard Olive vomit into the flowerbeds
dragged Olive out of bed at 7am to go white-water rafting (He didn't make it, but I think it's for the best. He did pay 1000 baht for the non-trip though: straight Rossin')
learned the traditional thai hangover cure: drink more (you see why I love this country...)
got a mud facial
spent approximately 7 hours winding through the mountains in our VIP minibus
rufied myself with 2 baht travel sickness pills again
what a weekend.
Only in Pai...
Friday, August 6, 2010
chaa yen cures hangovers
It is a well-known fact that juice cures hangovers. However, I would like to inform you of a startling discovery: chaa yen (thai red iced tea) also cures hangovers.
You might be wondering, what exactly is this magical substance? So I'll tell you. Chaa yen is very sugary Thai Ceylon tea, distinguishable by its red colour, poured over a glass full of ice, topped up with condensed milk. The finished product looks something like this:
It is one of the most delicious concoctions on this planet.
So this morning I woke up with my usual hungover insomnia at about 8am, having spent last night at miguel's, warm-up, discovery and some club I don't even know the name of drinking another thai classic: sangsom and coke. Eventually, by 11am I could stand it no longer and desperately needed some chaa yen and possibly a 7-11 pizza bread. I went to a bakery (passing a crowing rooster, a flood and many hyperactive builders asking me where I was going) and got some kind of suspicious looking processed meat and sugary bread combination and then strolled back down thanon suan dok, ready for a trip to Mr. Willeam, my favourite iced tea stand.
However, when I get there Mr. Willeam himself was there, but not the tea stand. He offers me food, and I politely decline, asking instead for a chaa yen. He shows me a map and tries to explain something in Thai, at which point I look completely befuddled. So instead, he pulls out a motorbike and instructs me to go with him.
Now I know that in England only a crazy person would jump on a motorbike, without a helmet, with a virtual stranger, going to an unknown destination. But this is Thailand, so that's exactly what I do. Anyway, he drives me down the road, to his office/ shop, where his wife is waiting with the tea stand. She makes me my chaa yen, and then Mr. Willeam gives me a lift to my door (well, gate, I live on a compound now cos I'm posh like that). If that isn't good customer service, I don't know what is. I'm only halfway through the chaa yen now, but already the hangover is receding. Epic win all round.
You might be wondering, what exactly is this magical substance? So I'll tell you. Chaa yen is very sugary Thai Ceylon tea, distinguishable by its red colour, poured over a glass full of ice, topped up with condensed milk. The finished product looks something like this:
It is one of the most delicious concoctions on this planet.
So this morning I woke up with my usual hungover insomnia at about 8am, having spent last night at miguel's, warm-up, discovery and some club I don't even know the name of drinking another thai classic: sangsom and coke. Eventually, by 11am I could stand it no longer and desperately needed some chaa yen and possibly a 7-11 pizza bread. I went to a bakery (passing a crowing rooster, a flood and many hyperactive builders asking me where I was going) and got some kind of suspicious looking processed meat and sugary bread combination and then strolled back down thanon suan dok, ready for a trip to Mr. Willeam, my favourite iced tea stand.
However, when I get there Mr. Willeam himself was there, but not the tea stand. He offers me food, and I politely decline, asking instead for a chaa yen. He shows me a map and tries to explain something in Thai, at which point I look completely befuddled. So instead, he pulls out a motorbike and instructs me to go with him.
Now I know that in England only a crazy person would jump on a motorbike, without a helmet, with a virtual stranger, going to an unknown destination. But this is Thailand, so that's exactly what I do. Anyway, he drives me down the road, to his office/ shop, where his wife is waiting with the tea stand. She makes me my chaa yen, and then Mr. Willeam gives me a lift to my door (well, gate, I live on a compound now cos I'm posh like that). If that isn't good customer service, I don't know what is. I'm only halfway through the chaa yen now, but already the hangover is receding. Epic win all round.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Changes ch ch changes
I'm useless, I apologise, I haven't blogged in forever. And I have to get up at 4am tomorrow to go on a sponsored bike ride (for which I have sought no sponsorship), so I thought tonight would be a fun night to catch up.
At the weekend I went to Pai with Jane and Lauren, and awesome times were had all round. A slightly sad thing was that one of my favourite bars from when I went there two years ago had been shut down. I've also been hearing stories from the returned interns, and it seems like this part of the world has got worse, not better, in the past couple of years. A freeway has been built over the riverside area in Vientiane where I ate a plate of laap that was the spiciest meal I've had in my entire life. The lakeside hostels by Boeng Kak lake in Phnom Penh have been demolishes, and the local residents evicted, to make way for 'development' projects that benefit only rich Chinese, Korean and Japanese investors, not the Khmer people.
Beer at the riverside in Laos, last time around
And chilling out by the lake in Phnom Penh:
But, as one of the other interns said, maybe it's just that "poverty looks better". The lakeside in Phnom Penh was full of trash and rats, and Vientiane really could do with some decent roads. Traffic in Chiang Mai is a nightmare when it rains (which it has been doing with increasing frequency) because tough planning laws mean that you can't just knock down a wat and build a freeway, and now people drive cars, not motorbikes. And the flashy Chiang Mai coffee shops have moved in to Pai, but those are Thai companies employing lots of local people, not reggae bars staffed by backpackers working for free.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I feel conflicted: these places had a certain ramshackle charm last time around, but I don't want people to stay poor just because it looks prettier. And I also feel conflicted because I said "trash" and "freeway" not "rubbish" and "motorway", and I am trying to cling on to the last vestiges of my englishness, even if it means people give me dodgy looks when I say, "I'm going out for a fag"...
At the weekend I went to Pai with Jane and Lauren, and awesome times were had all round. A slightly sad thing was that one of my favourite bars from when I went there two years ago had been shut down. I've also been hearing stories from the returned interns, and it seems like this part of the world has got worse, not better, in the past couple of years. A freeway has been built over the riverside area in Vientiane where I ate a plate of laap that was the spiciest meal I've had in my entire life. The lakeside hostels by Boeng Kak lake in Phnom Penh have been demolishes, and the local residents evicted, to make way for 'development' projects that benefit only rich Chinese, Korean and Japanese investors, not the Khmer people.
Beer at the riverside in Laos, last time around
But, as one of the other interns said, maybe it's just that "poverty looks better". The lakeside in Phnom Penh was full of trash and rats, and Vientiane really could do with some decent roads. Traffic in Chiang Mai is a nightmare when it rains (which it has been doing with increasing frequency) because tough planning laws mean that you can't just knock down a wat and build a freeway, and now people drive cars, not motorbikes. And the flashy Chiang Mai coffee shops have moved in to Pai, but those are Thai companies employing lots of local people, not reggae bars staffed by backpackers working for free.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I feel conflicted: these places had a certain ramshackle charm last time around, but I don't want people to stay poor just because it looks prettier. And I also feel conflicted because I said "trash" and "freeway" not "rubbish" and "motorway", and I am trying to cling on to the last vestiges of my englishness, even if it means people give me dodgy looks when I say, "I'm going out for a fag"...
Thursday, July 22, 2010
7-11 Pizza Bread
28% wheat flour, 17.2% pork sausage, 8% sugar, 6.8% vegetable oil, 4.7% tomato sauce, 3% egg, 2% vegetable fat, 1.4% margarine, 0.7% salt, 0.4% yeast, unspecified % preservative and artificial colour: 100% delicious!
Monday, July 19, 2010
Two truths and a lie
This is a tale from teaching at the Juvenile Detention Centre (JDC).
We try to make our lessons interactive, and so we decided to play 'Two truths and a lie' at the JDC. In case you're not familiar with the game, I'll explain it. You have to tell a group of people three things about yourself, two of which are true, and one of which is a lie. They have to guess which is the lie. This is what one of them came up with: have a guess which is the lie....
1) I have videotaped people having sex
2) I have videotaped other people having sex
3) I was arrested for selling 9000 pills
Any ideas?
Nope?
The answer is 3) - she was actually arrested for selling 2000 pills.
This is why I love teaching at the JDC - the girls can be difficult, moody, distracted or disengaged, but never dull!
We try to make our lessons interactive, and so we decided to play 'Two truths and a lie' at the JDC. In case you're not familiar with the game, I'll explain it. You have to tell a group of people three things about yourself, two of which are true, and one of which is a lie. They have to guess which is the lie. This is what one of them came up with: have a guess which is the lie....
1) I have videotaped people having sex
2) I have videotaped other people having sex
3) I was arrested for selling 9000 pills
Any ideas?
Nope?
The answer is 3) - she was actually arrested for selling 2000 pills.
This is why I love teaching at the JDC - the girls can be difficult, moody, distracted or disengaged, but never dull!
Sunday, July 18, 2010
CThomas Weekly Journal 12th-19th July 2010
My boss makes us all write him a journal each week so he can keep an eye on what we've been up to. He says it can be any format we want - I decided to test it this week by making an illustrated version of the week's events, complete with lyrics from "Don't stop believin'" by Journey... the song I've had in my head all week. Enjoy....
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Long live the King!
Last night I went to see Twilight. Please don't judge. There were just so many fitties...
The Thai movie-going experience is pretty similar to the UK: giant and overpriced cokes, ridiculously cold air-con, queues of squealing girls and their reluctant boyfriends (but maybe that last one's just Twilight) except for one significant difference. At the start of the film, after all the trailers and the ridiculously fast-paced and surreal Thai ads, everyone stands up (it's actually illegal not to!), and they play the national anthem.
Here it is, for those who are interested:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DLOhfo0MO00
It's accompanied by quite an amazing video in the cinema as well, involving soviet-esque shots of dams and other symbols of progress towards industrialisation, as well as propaganda style scenes of young beautiful women and their adorable chubby babies. And, of course, the King.
There was a photo here, but it now has to be removed, because I want to do another post and it's against the law in Thailand to have a photo of the King lower than a photo of anyone else on a web page. They actually just made a new protect the king cybercrime unit to enforce this too!
Thai people REALLY love the King. In Bangkok we spotted flourescent orange "long live the King!" wristbands, which a few of the other interns are now proudly wearing. There's pictures of the King everywhere - like on the entrance to the airport, on bridges across main roads in Chiang Mai, in pretty much every Thai person's house - doing pretty much anything you can imagine - playing golf, wearing monk robes, getting on planes etc. And in the cinema video, my favourite part was a shot of two small children drawing pictures... of the King and Queen.
The King is on the money here, and it's actually a criminal offence to step on money, because that's stepping on a picture of the King, and stepping on stuff is really offensive in Buddhist cultures because the feet are considered the lowest part of the body, so to put them above or on someone else's body is a massive insult. Even pointing at pictures of the King is quite rude. It's kind of cool though, in a way - I think maybe here the King is an enduring symbol of unity in quite a diverse nation, whereas in the UK, the Queen is a nice old lady who doesn't really do anybody any harm, and the rest of the royal family aren't good for much except Daily Mail feature stories.
But, saying all that, the Thai national anthem (which gets played twice a day on all radio stations), translated, is actually
'Thailand is the unity of Thai blood and body.
The whole country belongs to the Thai people, maintaining thus far for the Thai.
All Thais intend to unite together.
Thais love peace but do not fear to fight.
They will never let anyone threaten their independence.
They will sacrifice every drop of their blood to contribute to the nation, will serve their country with pride and prestige full of victory.
CHAI YO. [Cheers]."
...No mention of the King whatsoever.
Whereas ours is:
God save our gracious Queen,
God save our noble Queen,
God save the Queen
etc.
...so who am I to talk about being obsessed with the royal family?
I think only one thing remains to be said:
The Thai movie-going experience is pretty similar to the UK: giant and overpriced cokes, ridiculously cold air-con, queues of squealing girls and their reluctant boyfriends (but maybe that last one's just Twilight) except for one significant difference. At the start of the film, after all the trailers and the ridiculously fast-paced and surreal Thai ads, everyone stands up (it's actually illegal not to!), and they play the national anthem.
Here it is, for those who are interested:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DLOhfo0MO00
It's accompanied by quite an amazing video in the cinema as well, involving soviet-esque shots of dams and other symbols of progress towards industrialisation, as well as propaganda style scenes of young beautiful women and their adorable chubby babies. And, of course, the King.
There was a photo here, but it now has to be removed, because I want to do another post and it's against the law in Thailand to have a photo of the King lower than a photo of anyone else on a web page. They actually just made a new protect the king cybercrime unit to enforce this too!
Thai people REALLY love the King. In Bangkok we spotted flourescent orange "long live the King!" wristbands, which a few of the other interns are now proudly wearing. There's pictures of the King everywhere - like on the entrance to the airport, on bridges across main roads in Chiang Mai, in pretty much every Thai person's house - doing pretty much anything you can imagine - playing golf, wearing monk robes, getting on planes etc. And in the cinema video, my favourite part was a shot of two small children drawing pictures... of the King and Queen.
The King is on the money here, and it's actually a criminal offence to step on money, because that's stepping on a picture of the King, and stepping on stuff is really offensive in Buddhist cultures because the feet are considered the lowest part of the body, so to put them above or on someone else's body is a massive insult. Even pointing at pictures of the King is quite rude. It's kind of cool though, in a way - I think maybe here the King is an enduring symbol of unity in quite a diverse nation, whereas in the UK, the Queen is a nice old lady who doesn't really do anybody any harm, and the rest of the royal family aren't good for much except Daily Mail feature stories.
But, saying all that, the Thai national anthem (which gets played twice a day on all radio stations), translated, is actually
'Thailand is the unity of Thai blood and body.
The whole country belongs to the Thai people, maintaining thus far for the Thai.
All Thais intend to unite together.
Thais love peace but do not fear to fight.
They will never let anyone threaten their independence.
They will sacrifice every drop of their blood to contribute to the nation, will serve their country with pride and prestige full of victory.
CHAI YO. [Cheers]."
...No mention of the King whatsoever.
Whereas ours is:
God save our gracious Queen,
God save our noble Queen,
God save the Queen
etc.
...so who am I to talk about being obsessed with the royal family?
I think only one thing remains to be said:
Monday, July 12, 2010
bangkrak?
Before I write anything about Bangkok, I would like to add a disclaimer: I haven't really slept for about 30 hours so nothing I say should be taken seriously by anyone. ALSO today I had a meeting with someone whose name was "Kiddieporn". And I was only with my boss and thai people so nobody else found it amusing.
Annnnnnyyyyyway Bangkok. The reason I am so epicly tired is because we got a flight at stupid o clock this morning to get back in time for work, and then I had to go to the juvenile detention centre, and then to a meeting where I had to be alive, and then do work. I tried to sleep on the floor of the prison but unsurprisingly, it wasn't particularly comfortable, and I had major dengue paranoia so I had to keep twitching to throw off the mosquitos. Me and Kyla didn't even watch the world cup final last nigh because we were too preoccupied with trying on our purchases from the final round of drunk shopping. Now, we all know drunk shopping is always an amazing idea. And we also all know that you get better at foreign languages when you're drunk. So when you get to drunk haggling in thai you reach drunk nirvana and it's AWESOME. I bought a dress, a jumper, two tops, a ring with the letter H (for hipster), a ring with a cassette, some bangles and best of all, some pacman earrings. All entirely useful. Specially the pacman earrings.
The best shopping experience by far was the truly epic chatuchak (that's definitely not how you spell it, but I have no idea how, so you're going to have to get over it) market. It's apparently the biggest weekend market in the entire world ever, and it has about 8000 stalls. What that means in real life is that I walked around it for about five hours on Saturday, thought I saw everything, came back on Sunday and went to a whole new section that I hadn't even been to yet. It's a maze of really trendy and cheap designer boutiques, 8000 baht antiques, dried fish that makes you retch if you get stuck behind the little man who walks round really slowly singing, vintage leather and levis and utter shit. I came to the conclusion that if it's not in chatuchak, it doesn't exist. Unfortunately if it does exist, it will only exist in size tiny. However, pacman earrings don't come in sizes, so all's right with the world.
Apart from shopping, my time in bangkok involved a lot of riding around in the sexy hot pink taxi meters, a lot of lounging by the pool, a life-changing steak sandwich and an outrageous amount of tuk tuk karaoke, fuelled by 7-11 smirnoff mules. I don't even know what a smirnoff mule is, but I know it's delicious and it makes you want to sing journey a lot. I'm currently having a bit of a dilemma, because I have "don't stop believing" in my head, but I don't have my headphones with me, and the potential embarassment I would face if someone walked in and I was genuinely listening to that song alone in the office at night would be horrific. I blame Chris for knowing all the words to everything. No, I am actually going to listen to it. Please don't tell anyone.
To distract you, here's a picture of seven (yes SEVEN) of us in a tuk tuk. If you've ever ridden in a tuk tuk, you'll understand...
I apologise, because this has been entirely nonsensical, and I haven't really said anything much about anything. Just stop and be quiet now. Sleepytime.
Annnnnnyyyyyway Bangkok. The reason I am so epicly tired is because we got a flight at stupid o clock this morning to get back in time for work, and then I had to go to the juvenile detention centre, and then to a meeting where I had to be alive, and then do work. I tried to sleep on the floor of the prison but unsurprisingly, it wasn't particularly comfortable, and I had major dengue paranoia so I had to keep twitching to throw off the mosquitos. Me and Kyla didn't even watch the world cup final last nigh because we were too preoccupied with trying on our purchases from the final round of drunk shopping. Now, we all know drunk shopping is always an amazing idea. And we also all know that you get better at foreign languages when you're drunk. So when you get to drunk haggling in thai you reach drunk nirvana and it's AWESOME. I bought a dress, a jumper, two tops, a ring with the letter H (for hipster), a ring with a cassette, some bangles and best of all, some pacman earrings. All entirely useful. Specially the pacman earrings.
The best shopping experience by far was the truly epic chatuchak (that's definitely not how you spell it, but I have no idea how, so you're going to have to get over it) market. It's apparently the biggest weekend market in the entire world ever, and it has about 8000 stalls. What that means in real life is that I walked around it for about five hours on Saturday, thought I saw everything, came back on Sunday and went to a whole new section that I hadn't even been to yet. It's a maze of really trendy and cheap designer boutiques, 8000 baht antiques, dried fish that makes you retch if you get stuck behind the little man who walks round really slowly singing, vintage leather and levis and utter shit. I came to the conclusion that if it's not in chatuchak, it doesn't exist. Unfortunately if it does exist, it will only exist in size tiny. However, pacman earrings don't come in sizes, so all's right with the world.
Apart from shopping, my time in bangkok involved a lot of riding around in the sexy hot pink taxi meters, a lot of lounging by the pool, a life-changing steak sandwich and an outrageous amount of tuk tuk karaoke, fuelled by 7-11 smirnoff mules. I don't even know what a smirnoff mule is, but I know it's delicious and it makes you want to sing journey a lot. I'm currently having a bit of a dilemma, because I have "don't stop believing" in my head, but I don't have my headphones with me, and the potential embarassment I would face if someone walked in and I was genuinely listening to that song alone in the office at night would be horrific. I blame Chris for knowing all the words to everything. No, I am actually going to listen to it. Please don't tell anyone.
To distract you, here's a picture of seven (yes SEVEN) of us in a tuk tuk. If you've ever ridden in a tuk tuk, you'll understand...
I apologise, because this has been entirely nonsensical, and I haven't really said anything much about anything. Just stop and be quiet now. Sleepytime.
Monday, July 5, 2010
America Special Day!
Saturday, July 3, 2010
The joys of working for free
Our final bingo lesson was the most successful - we read the numbers out in English and most of the kids actually crossed them off their sheets when we did. However, they went from being extremely shy and unwilling to participate to shouting BINGO BINGO BINGO so loudly we struggled to make ourselves heard. For the older kids, we dispensed with the bingo and went for telling the time instead - I think we managed to eventually get across the concept of "quarter past", although we didn't quite manage "quarter to". After the first three lessons, we stopped for lunch which was delicious fried rice that unfortunately came in orphan-sized portions, accompanied by monsoon rain and the obligatory photos of the falang teachers in front of the blackboard. By fourth lesson I was too tired to do much but gently point the kids in the direction of the right numbers, trying my best to "elicit knowledge from the learners" rather than telling them the answers.
All in all though, it was a really lovely day with some incredibly cute kids. I'm kind of getting the hang of this teaching thing, just about, and making it up as I go along. The kids apparently loved the flashcards - they were for a class I wasn't teaching - and so we decided to donate them, meaning a thai childrens' home is now decorated with pictures of a gecko, a native american, a hamburger, an elephant, ronald mcdonald and a moose (In case you couldn't guess, that's an America/Thailand theme). So, in conclusion, after an exhausting day, I would summarise what I've learned so far as "flashcards good, bingo bad".
Friday, July 2, 2010
Things they have in the supermarket in Thailand
Crisps in crab curry, sweet basil and roast pork bun flavours
Waitrose rich tea biscuits
Chocolate bread with a bun inside the loaf
Litre bottles of fish sauce
The world's most overpriced cheese
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Hello Thailand!
The Americans have told me I have to write a blog, so here I am.
Here is Chiang Mai in the north of Thailand. More specifically, Thanon Suan Dok, soi 6. Even more specifically, somewhere near the back of the office, on the right, directly under the air con. This office belongs to Bridges Across Borders Southeast Asia (BABSEA), who I'm doing an internship with this summer.
I just arrived on Monday and since then I've read a lot about AIDS and drank a lot of sangsom. I've been trying to get my head round all the different projects, the Americans have been here about five weeks now so I've kind of been thrown in at the deep end a bit. Some of the stuff I've been doing has been editing lesson plans for a UNAIDS project in Viet nam, teaching about employment at a women's refuge, reading up on how intellectual property law affects access to medicines and getting eaten alive by mosquitos.
Life at babsea isn't all work and no play though. The Americans (they don't get individual names yet) have kindly provided me with much entertainment, mostly involving sangsom. We've had sangsom and texas hold'em last night, sangsom and clubbing the night before, and sangsom and vomiting the night before that. But for a bit of variation, on Tuesday night, we drank beer. We were hanging out at a coffee shop where Don, the office manager at babsea, was throwing a party, and then a casual elephant turned up in the garden. So we went to say hello and fed him pineapple, but unfortunately this was traumatic for Vanessa, one of The Americans, who was rather concerned for the elephant's welfare. She and some of the other interns have dealt with their worries by spending today volunteering at a sanctuary for orphan elephants, where they taught law workshops for ESE (Elephants who have sex with Elephants).
While the others empowered elephants to access their legal rights (or just washed and fed them perhaps, I'm not quite sure which...), I had a bit of a wander with the new interns from Malaysia, and took them to our favourite veggie restaurant at the temple down the road. Then this afternoon me and Ellie and Jen, two of the other interns, went to a delightful café that looked like the inside of a macbook where I drank a delicious coffee-chocolate-ice-cream-sauce concoction. I'm developing an obsession with the iced drinks here which is clearly going to mean that I'll be the size of a thai elephant, rather than a thai person, by the time I return home. That's before we even get started on the food... I think I'll save that for another day though, because just the thought of it has made me hungry, so it's clearly supper time.
so, Ta ta for now
Carla
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